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Feb 29, 2008

A wise kitteh once said...

[Nice subtitles ya]

Suggested by Cristal und Peter over dinner last night.

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One of my favorites. We actually go around our house moaning "OH, LONG JOHN. WHY I EYES YA."

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:06 AM

Bwah! I can't stop laughing. He should have said "why I oughta" and shaken his little fist.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:09 AM

angry cat is ANGRY.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:10 AM

First extra paw pad/opposable thumbs, now they're mastering our inferior language. The Kitty Uprising is at last upon us!!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:10 AM

Have you seen the slightly longer version? The camera pulls out to reveal another kitteh a few feet away, meowing in an unsure (but much less intelligible) manner ...

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:11 AM

I'm probably revealing vast ignorance here, but is this cat actually MAKING these noises>? This isn't a human voice imposed on the image? 'Cause this is kinda scary . . . .

Mrs. P.
 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:13 AM

That video cracks me up Every. Single. Time. Ha!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:14 AM

I was wondering that too, Mrs. P. I think it's real? The longer video LimeyG posted shows another cat, so unless they perfectly placed that meow audio, it's hard to say whether it's fake. The audio quality was great intentionally, to get the warbling kitty so it isn't surprising that the meow is very loud as well.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:21 AM

Oh no, no, no, no, no. I am not watching this! I know this video! It will KEEL me one day. But not today! I need my brain a little longer and I like to breathe. Today is the day you almost got pyrit!~ I am going away now! Bye bye!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:23 AM

It's funny, whether or not it's real. I'm not sure I want to know. Sort of like the tooth fairy. I'll believe as long as it brings the funny.

Nancy Liedel - The Goat Rodeo
 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:24 AM

Mrs.P/Coffeecup, I'm pretty sure it is real. I have a cat that makes similar sounds - which are usually followed by him throwing up :(

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:29 AM

oh, it's real. Those are angry kitteh noises. When I worked at a vet hospital, those are the noises that made us get out the elbow length thick suede gloves :)

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:35 AM

Fairly sure it's real. If I remember right, that clip won America's Funniest Home Videos a few years ago.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:37 AM

When my cat was in heat, I put her in a dark room alone, hoping it would help keep her calm. I swear she said "Let me out of here right now!"

So I let her out.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:40 AM

... and also "Snorky. Talk. Man!"

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:41 AM

Peeps, it's real. My kitty used to "talk" like this occasionally in the middle of the night. (I'd awaken to little wet piles of "urp".)

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:44 AM

Yep, it was on AFV quite a few years ago, and I think the dude brought the kitty on the show when he won. A classic.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:46 AM

Funny, I know a woman irl who sounds like that! (She's French-Canadian, with a speech impediment... )

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:47 AM

I once googled "Oh Don Piano" and found a website selling T-shirts with that phrase printed on them!

[http://www.threadless.com/submission/111183/Oh_Don_Piano_2 - Ed.]

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:52 AM

This video is where I got the screen name I use occasionally on other forums - OhDonPiano. LOL!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:53 AM

Cracks me up every time.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:54 AM

Too funny, tears I'm crying,
Too much, now I'm dying,
When I'm ded, afterward,
In my wallet, my organ donor card,
(You'll also find my poetic license,
Please return it to the Bard)
"To Oh Long Johnson cat on the screen,
I donate my side-splitted spleen.
To Why I Eyes Ya mad feline,
I donate what's left of my mind.
And to the "yummies" pug named Charmaine,
I donate my melted brain."

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:56 AM

OMG, my stomach hutts from laughing! Too funny!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 08:57 AM

Too funny!

Yeah, my cats make noises and salivate like that when they're about to leave me a present on the carpet.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:00 AM

so absolutely adorables but i hope kitteh ain't too stressed out!!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:05 AM

Eww! Creepy! I'd die if my cat starting making noises like that. (Especially since I'm pretty sure he'd swear in front of the kids and start complaining about everything.)

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:08 AM

Spooky-cute; if my cat talked to me like that, I'd probably call an exorcist.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:18 AM


 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:20 AM

One of the bestest videos EVER.

A thinker
 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:23 AM

I've never seen that before! I feel sorry for the cat, though, because you know it must be REAL unhappy to make those sounds, but wow is that funny! ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY! HA!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:23 AM

I think what disturbs me about this is the horrible laugh track. It calls into question the whole nature of sound and has always sort of backed me into the corner of believing that this isn't "real." (Don't laugh, but I actually write about and study this sort of thing for a living -- the relationship between live events and mediation).

So I can't see it as cute, or even funny, just forced. But I grant that is probably just my sensibility, I'm not trying to persuade anyone else. It SHOULD be funny. But I'm not laughing.

Also, we have a cat that looks like this cat -- her name is Theo (really) and she's one of the meanest, hissin-ist, scratchin-ist cats I've ever known.

[Figures... - Ed.]

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:25 AM

These are the noises my kitty makes just before she barfs up her boots, so I don't find this cute. :(

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:41 AM

hey bertha: i don't know for sure, but i think the laugh track might come directly from the live audience at america's best home video. in which case it's not a "laugh track" at all!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:41 AM

Leslie Evans - LOL!

M. V.
 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:42 AM

Ashagato -- nah, that's a canned laugh track, all right. I think it was the Animal Planet version of America's Funniest Videos to start with (that is, not AFV itself) before somebody "captioned" it. At least for me, though, it doesn't detract much from the You're-So-Cute-When-You're-Angry kitty and the surreal subtitles.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:46 AM

Maybe I'm too sensitive: am I the only one who hates it when we laugh about kitties who are obviously freaked out and terrified? I hate these posts.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:47 AM

LOL Berthaslave..
sounds lilke your big cat matche our Teho big Cat in temprement


 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:48 AM

What the hell?! I should have known when my kitty started saying "I love you" that the cats would soon master our language. It's the catpocalypse!

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:48 AM

SBA -- Don Piano kitty's just mad about the new kitten, who's out-of-frame for most of this clip. (At our house, Spot still isn't too happy about Rikki being around, but they've come to terms.)

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:51 AM

My cat does that on occasion when she sees the neighbor kitty at the window. Neighbor kitty stands up, front paws on the window in the door. My poor kitty loses it.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:51 AM

I love watching AFV again not that they have an actually FUNNY host. They still pick the worst winners tho. (A baby, a animal and a random) I would hate to go up against a "cute" baby video. The "cute" baby videos are rarely as funny as the pet ones!
Now you have to post the talking dogs video! (no, not yummies)

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:52 AM

Wow, I'm surprised at seeing this here now. I'm sure I saw this video years ago.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:52 AM

Lol, very funny vid!

Holy Cuteness
 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:53 AM

Sorry to be the party pooper, but that cat isn't happy. What's done is done, but I don't know how you guys can laugh at it or find it cute.

My cat looks very very similar to that, and the eyes that cat has in that video are the same eyes my cat has when she's scared to hell as a result of fireworks....not good...

Jess L
 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:54 AM

The feral cats I feed outside sometimes sound like this at night when a can of feline whoop ass is about to be opened! Each time I watched this, it just got funnier and funnier! My favorite part is the little lilt in his voice as he says "Oh, Don PiANNNooo!"

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:54 AM

Berthaslave, have you ever heard of this group of people?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKEeHREK2nQ I'm sure you probably have - but I think this is something like what you're meaning about live/mediation, right?

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:54 AM

Jess L -- see above. Cat's not scared, s/he's just ticked about a *new* cat being around. No fireworks, just a kitten.

 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 09:56 AM

Angry kitty cat! And yes - pissed off kitty's really do sound like that - and like Maggie said - get out those thick leather gloves!

I had a cat that talked to himself just like that - especially when any neighbor kitty's came by to visit. We have one now that's conversational - just not so intelligible. He scares the dog, though. Her ridge goes up and she runs to mama or papa for salvation.

Gotta love them cats!

The Fat Lady Sings
 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 10:00 AM

So my cat reciting Shakespeares sonnetts is unusual.

Hon Glad
 |  Feb 29, 2008 at 10:03 AM

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