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Feb 13, 2008

Patches For Prez

When Patches wants a hamburger, PATCHES GETS A HAMBURGER IN HIS CADILLAC.

Check out Patches eating hamburglers, getting beer, answering the phone, and tucking himself in. Redonnnnnnnk! [singsong]

Johanna S., How about a Patches/Obama ticket?

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Comments

Bleen. I do love Patches.

Martha
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:41 AM

I love the seriousness with which the owner says "He can answer the phone, but he don't actually talk."

Kaye
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:42 AM

Patches is awesome. That is one handy house horse! (glaring at the dog, who never once has offered to get me a beer or grab the phone.)

cheryl
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:45 AM

OK... what?
I want to know how you figure out you have a horse that will ride in your convertible, eat burgers, answer your phone and tuck himself into bed?

fireflyez
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:49 AM

Does anyone else get the heebie jeebies from watching a horse eat cow meat?

Sloth
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:49 AM

Cute as it is to see a horse who thinks he's a human...umm, aren't horses herbivores? How is his system able to take cheeseburgers?

Any vets/horse people in the house?

anon
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:50 AM

That's an ol' Lincoln Continental - not a Cadillac! Definetely more fitting for an animal who might have Mustang in his blood!

Lucy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:50 AM

I had cheezeburger.

Lone
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:51 AM

fireflyez, the same way you figure out you should name your all-white horse "Patches."

Sandy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:51 AM

sloth, i was thinking exactly the same thing
but the look on the beagle's face is priceless !

nicefrenchgurl
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:54 AM

Um, THIS IS THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.

That is all.

Alice
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:54 AM

Patches is no longer whinnying with us; he seems to have passed away in fall 2006. he is survived by a son (Chip).

and apparently, he was spotted in his youth, hence the name Patches.

kbryna
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:55 AM

As far as I know, that burger would kill the horse because they can't digest meat, bread, etc.

Ignorant hillbillies sho izz fun

furpants
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:55 AM

OK, this is THE most redonkulous thing I have EVEH seen! They do need to teach Patches to close the refridgerator door when he's through though.

Martha in Washington
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:56 AM

Haha, that has to be the most absolutely ridiculous horse I've ever seen. And about the eating meat part- I have no idea why he can eat it, since horses are herbivores. I've been riding for about 10 years or so and I've never heard of any of them having meat, but the love granola bars :D

Megan
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:58 AM

My Icelandic horse digests bread just fine; it is his preferred snack as it is with many Icelandics. The meat, I am not so sure about. :-) Funny video though.

kyfilly
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:00 AM

He would not be able to digest the burger, but the bread he could and the burger would pass through his system, not kill him. Not that I want to feed a horse hamburgers.

Nancy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:01 AM

Well now i've seen everything.;

CB
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:01 AM

fireflyez, the same way you figure out you should name your all-white horse "Patches."

Sandy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:02 AM

According to this site:
http://www.goatview.com/january19.htm
Patches lived to be 24 1/2!
lolz Patches 4 Prez!

Cecilia
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:03 AM

"He answers the phone, but he doesn't actually talk. He just moves his lips." hahahaha wow.

paranoiagirl
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:04 AM

I think Patches is great -- but there is something deeply, deeply wrong (and very American) about putting a horse in a car, driving it to McDonald's, and feeding it ground-up beef. Once upon a time, horses WERE the transportation, they didn't GET transportation! And they shore didn't eat their stable-mates. But I like him answering the phone and pretending to tuck himself in. G'night, Patches! Rest in peace!

SixFootJen
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:05 AM

Re the hovertext: Nevermind the silly car, did you see the matching trailer?!?

I think it's just another example of a creature not being aware what kind of animal they are. If a dog can think it's a cat, why not a pony that thinks it's human?

If Patches were still around to run with Obama, I think we'd have a surefire winner there.

yankeebird
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:08 AM

Horse eats cow? O_O

M.
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:12 AM

I agree with the other peeps. A horse eating his stablemate just seems a little creepy. He is cute tho'!

Long Live Anthromorphication! (is that even a real word?)

Momof2kitties
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:13 AM

I think that there's something terribly wrong with how these peeps handle their horse. Horses, or any other animals for that matter, aren't human and shouldn't be treated as such!

Annica
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:14 AM

I love that the redneck in charge says, "I'm the one's responsible for that I drink."

Noooo! R'lly?

Andi
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:16 AM

Er...wow. Just what every family needs.

And yeah, it's a bit disturbing to feed a horse a burger. On the other hand, my dad raises pigs, and they get ALL the table scraps--meat and pork-related ones included. I keep telling him he's going to end up with pigs like those crazy man-eating ones from Hannibal, but he won't listen...

Loramir
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:17 AM

I have a feeling Patches has just a bit more going on upstairs than his owner.

Kaye: totally agree with the: I love the seriousness with which the owner says "He can answer the phone, but he don't actually talk."

Wow... I mean... wow. I have a feeling this ain't exactly the type o' folk who'd be voting for Mr. Obama. :)

Beth
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:19 AM

Come on Patches! The refrigerator door! Close it! What? Were you born in a barn? Oh, yeah, that's right - you were.

Mallory
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:19 AM

OMG, I hadn't seen them making him get them a beer yet. Good heavens.

Also, I wonder what it sounds like to the person on the other end of the phone?

Loramir
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:20 AM

BEYOND REDONK

jonathan
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:20 AM

i dont think the horse or the car are redonk.
but those guys certainly are.
(horse is brilliant!)

liz
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:20 AM

Mallory FTW!

Pheas
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:23 AM

If I learned anything from Cosmo Kramer, its that horses shouldn't eat Beef-A-Reeno.

Costanza
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:28 AM

Who ARE these guys?!

It's like "Brokeback Mountain" meets a mute "Mr. Ed"...?

Anyway, as someone who has had a few horses in my day, I've seen them eat just about everything (not a cheeseburger, but a pony nomming into a someone's ham sandwitch). While I'm sure cheeseburgers weren't the best thing for old Patches, if you want to get really technical about things, there are animal products (worse stuff than ground beef I'm sure...) and other crazy things in many brands of large-animal pelleted feed and supplements. Horses have pretty strong stomachs, this video should be an obvious testament to that, so stop yer worryin'! 24 is a pretty long run.

I'd be more concerned with what would happen to Patches if someone hit the Lincoln! Do they make seatbelts for ponies?!

-K

kerrymc
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:33 AM

I want a pet that can fetch me a beer. Heck, I would almost consder acquiring a kid if it could do *that*. ;)

mleiv
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:33 AM

I'm just hoping it's a veggie burger.

Wow, that is one incredible horse!

Tammy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:34 AM

Oh I don't think these fellows are ignorant hillbillies. They are super-earnest and they're obviously bemused by the whole thing. Is it just me, or would Patches have to a pretty small horse to be able to get in the car and such?

Julie
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:36 AM

That has GOT to be the picture next to "redneck" in the dictionary.

Kiragirl
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:37 AM

That was just . . . wow. . . really wow. For me, the best part was the wind whipping through Patches' mane while he rode in the car.

debg
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:37 AM

how crazy are these guys feeding a horse beef and putting it in a car. they really p*** me off. horse should have turned back and make them eat grass all day and let them sleep in the barn.

Khadija
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:38 AM

1. I didn't notice if he was wearing a diaper... 'cause generally... horses...


2. Are they trying to make him grow a beer belly like them?

Fransouah
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:39 AM

Uh, I can have cuteness stroke now? Crazyness.

jd
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:41 AM

SUBLIME! The look on Patches' face as they're driving off, his chin on the windshield. I do believe that is one happy lil pony. I don't think he's big enough to be a horse. Is anyone out there old enough to remember a wooden pull toy named "Patch Pony"?


ritabby
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:43 AM

A HORSE that eats COW!!...weird

ks
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:46 AM

that has got to be the chillest horsey ever! while his brethren are shying at unfamiliar footprints, and refusing to walk past mailboxes they've seen a hundred times before, he just casually moseys into a convertible and cruises around in traffic, mane flowing in the wind. incredible.

p.s. i don't think they were feeding him whole cheeseburgers. looked to me like he just got a couple nibbles.

anner
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:47 AM

Dangit, I knew there would be nuffers screaming "REDNECK HORSE KILLER!" the second I watched it. It's so adorably innocent and the men obviously love their pet, can we leave it at that? Patches clearly survived Burgergate, as have many curious and sneaky horses who get some alone time with their handler's food.

katerpie
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:48 AM

Ahhh! There's a HORSE-HEAD IN THE BED!!

Oh, sorry--just had a "Godfather" moment.

LimeyG
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:50 AM

Horses can usually (as far as i've experienced) digest meat just fine, it's usually just a matter of whether or not they'll eat it or not. There's a stud at my barn who eats burgers, too, and barbecued chicken. :D
At the very least, they need to give this sweet boy a seat belt. I love this precious little horse.

Legi
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:51 AM

There are way too many people going "No way should someone treat a horse like that! I know how a horse SHOULD be treated!"

Patches was clearly a very happy horse. I know my horse would think I'm crazy if I offered for her to get in the car, but hey, if it's what Patches wanted to do and it was safe, why the heck not? The same for having him sleep in the house. If you can manage it, and the animal's healthy and happy, no one else should be criticizing.

Vitani
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:51 AM

That totally reminds me of the Disney version of "The Wind in the Willows" where Mr. Toad finds the motorcar and tells his cart horse to hop in and check it out. But wouldn't Patches prefer a side salad and Apple Dippers when he went to McDonalds?

Sharon Wilson
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:53 AM

OK. Patches fetches the beer out of the fridge. But, I got a question to ask y'all. Does he DRINK beer?

Also, I'd feel a bit better about the burger if it were a veggie burger, but McDonalds doesn't usually sell veggie burgers. (Hence why I don't eat at McDonalds. I'd eat there now and then if they did.) :-(

Silent Meow
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:57 AM

LOL!!!

L to the O
to the FRICKIN L!!!!

that is the funniest, cutest, most REDONKULOUS THING I HAVE EVER SEEN!!!! I WANT A SMALL WHITE HORSE TOO THAT THINKS ITS A PONY!!!
AAAH!!! *tucks self in*

Allegra
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 11:58 AM

I remember my sister's pony wrapping her lips around a can of diet soda, tipping it up and chugging it.

Just loved the way the guys padded the top of the windshield, so Patches could rest his chin on it.

Sandy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:05 PM

Most. Redonk. Thing. EVAH.

I ADORE the way he rests his chin on the top of the windscreen to maximise the wind-in-face factor. :D

Clare
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:11 PM

Everyone who is having a cow about a horse eating a cow can relax. Should it not properly digest, it will go the natural way of all undigestable things and the "redneck hillbillies" will be shoveling it out of his bed in the morning. :)

Gosh, what a pampered pony, though.

Kit
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:15 PM

Ha...if the horse can't digest meat, it'll just go on thru. Might make for messy poop tho. I don't know the last time you heard of someone that got sick and died from swallowing gum (you can't digest that by the way!)

Very cute! Too bad he's gone. :(

Red
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:20 PM

This is great!!!! I love it. Glad I wasn't a stranger driving down the road and come across a Lincoln with a horse in the back seat though, there would have been some definite screeching of tires and possible careening over the road while I looked in amazement.

Mary (the first)
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:21 PM

Most adorable PONY ever.. And he is funny too.... Oh and the refitted car fabulous...

Annie
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:31 PM

Horse eating cow = creepy

Kim
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:32 PM

I agree, Kim. You can't feed a horse cow meat. Wrong.

Jessismore
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:35 PM

Onoes, he left the fridge door open!

kayouko
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:39 PM

Holy moly! I love Patches, he looks so happy when the wind is blowing in his face!

And I'm still lol-ing about "He don't actually talk". Thanks for clearing that up Mr!

Renae
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:40 PM

I have read that some people who depended on their horses, the Mongols or Cossacks or Tartars fed their horses the same things they ate, including raw meat. The horses survived.


Pearl Ostroff
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:42 PM

OK, kerrymc...

'It's like "Brokeback Mountain" meets a mute "Mr. Ed"...?'

I have LOL'd about 5 times TOTAL over things I have read on the interwebs, and this was one of them!

fireflyez
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:44 PM

kayouko--HAHA! Onoes! The horsie literally said icanhascheezburger?

To which the men reply, "yes!"

Jessismore
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:44 PM

I have never, ever wanted to participate in social and/or political commentary on this site, but I can't hold my tongue on this one.

Please stop with the "redneck" comments - it's insulting and rude.

dg1532
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:51 PM

Anyone who is saying that the improperly digested meat will pass just fine has obviously never experienced a horse collicking.

The scary hamburger scene aside, this was totally hilarious and adorable!

Ingrid
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:52 PM

You know you're from Northern Florida if...

All humor aside, enough with the "OMGREDNEKS" y'all. It's a cultural thing, and Patches looked plenty happy to me.

Does anyone know how old this video is?

Amanda
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:53 PM

Ha. I saw this a few weeks back when I searched "dumb horse" on youtube.

hannah
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 12:59 PM

Lol it is a bit weird that he was eating hamburger, but so long as it's not hurting him I don't see the problem.
So Patches died though? Awww.. that's sad. Poor thing.

LisaL
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:00 PM

i think it's nice that these men were open to the possibility that maybe patches didn't *want* to be a plain ol' horse- that he just might like a ride in the car, or to join 'em on the couch to watch a little t.v.

to me, it shows how in-tune with their animal they are- i don't get where the 'ignorant redneck' comments are coming from. i think it's adorable how much they love him and how much he seems to love them right back.

yeah, the hamburger thing made me a little squeamish, but i wouldn't call it abuse. and at least patches was smart enough to know soda pop was bad for him!

circuscake
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:05 PM

AAAAAAAGH! THERE'S A HORSE HEAD IN MY BED! Oh, wait. There's a horse there too. I thought it was the Dixie Mafia striking again.

Btw -- aren't horses herbivores?

Mel
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:08 PM

dang.
i di-nint need to know he died.
kind of ruins the 'makin-fun-of-the-hicks' portion of this post.
he coulda lived in my back yard thou , if he wanted to.

liz
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:12 PM

My parrot can answer the phone, but he can't pick it up. Maybe he needs to team up with Patches. Patches can pick up the phone, and Charlie can say "hullloooOOOOOoooo?"

charliewabba
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:19 PM

Crazy! That horse thinks he's people!

Candace
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:29 PM

I think a horse eating cow meat is wrong. Isn't that how mad cow disease got started in the first place? feeding residue meat to herbivores?
But he is adorable.

sc
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:29 PM

Kaye - I as just about to make the exact same comment you made about - "He can answer the phone, but he don't actually talk." Of course he doesnt talk, he's a horse!

paul
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:36 PM

Why is it acceptable to refer to people as "hillbillies" and "ignorant rednecks"? Oh right, because they have a southern accent. Geez.

Pussytoes
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:41 PM

Uh, why was the horse eating a burger?
I mean, it's cute and everything, but eww...

Caitlin
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:41 PM

OMG BRRRGRRR PONIES!!!11!!

tree
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:46 PM

> is there a vet in the house?

Despite what we (vets) tell owners, the truth is that pet horses eat a whole lot of stuff we don't know about. I suspect that much of the time they get away with it, but they are so sensitive to colic (and we only see the sick ones) that I wouldn't be risking feeding a cheeseburger to a horse. It looks like this is done fairly regularly which is definitely NOT GOOD. Horses are herbivores. (Pigs are omnivores so do better on scraps but that is a whole nother kettle of fish) I also wouldn't be getting a horse to pick up beer because they do have a way of tipping things back into their mouth and a beer bottle could make a pretty nasty laryngeal foreign body. However, I thought the guys in the clip were gorgeous.

Dr Anne
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:46 PM

yeah, i'm gonna have to agree with everyone thusfar in that my initial reaction was picturing a wild horse taking down a wild cow and eating it, and as amusing as that is in my head, it's also very unrealistic. the hell are they feeding the horse burgers for?

the ending reminded me that i'm watching the godfather tonight.

Seth T.
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:48 PM

My sister's horse ate a hamburger once. Voluntarily. It like, stole a hamburger that my sister was trying to eat. The horse also ate a box of rubberbands. Neither seemed to cause problems, though I can't recommend rubberbands as a healthy diet.

Nice to see all the comments nixing the southerner bashing/mocking. Lotsa good folks out there from south or north.

catablob
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:53 PM

Can I has cheese burger?

Jen
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 01:59 PM

THIS IS FLOCKEN' REDONK!!

Naiara
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:04 PM

Was that horse eating BEEF???

Bryn
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:04 PM

THIS IS OFFICIALLY THE MOST RIDICULOUS THING I HAVE EVER SEEN. AND I'M A HORSEPERSON.

Sorry for the shouting. BUT THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN. However, I cannot believe A HORSE EATING BEEF??!

A thinker
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:09 PM

Whoever said McDonald's hamburgers were beef?

Ceolmhor
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:11 PM

Is this for real? Craziness! I love it!

kelebek
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:12 PM

Also, SilentMeow: I don't know if *this* horse drank beer, but many do. It's fairly common, especially for racehorses. Hey, it's a grain product!

A thinker
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:17 PM

what's up with all the indignant people about poor Patches nomming on a cheeseburger? as we all know from past postings/stories, there's plenty of animals that have broken out of their -vore classifications. like bunnies that loved catfood and leather, even though their system is in no way able to handle meat, but the buns would charge the cats to steal their food. can you imagine if these guys denied hungry Patches a cheeseburger? he'd stomp the car flat and neigh angrily until they produced a bushel of burgers for him.

And the redneck comments? Sheesh. If commenting seriously that the horse can't talk qualifies you as redneck, what about all the city people i know that swear their cat is talking to them?

Yes Patches, YOU CAN HAZ CHEEZBURGERS!!!

estella
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:19 PM

Pretty awesome, though I agree with everyone who said that it appears fundamentally wrong for the horse to be eating a cheeseburger...

Annie J
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:21 PM

Of course, if you think Patches ate the burger, you're assuming the meat patty was still in the bread, and you've never eaten with a picky 3-year old human. The meat can be removed bread and "fixin's".

MamaDawn
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:26 PM

Those guys are too anerable when they notice that maybe Patches might want to go with them and say Let's make the car so he can get in! And then they do it!

Jorden
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:33 PM

What a spoiled little pony! I want one!

gravyboat
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:35 PM

As cute as this is, there's something very sad about a hourse riding around in a car and eating burgers, and SLEEPING IN A BED?!

Does he also use the toilet?

Jacquie
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 02:50 PM

Jacquie -- not more than once, I'm guessing.

Pheas
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:01 PM

I wish my pets got me beers! I'm now waiting to find the pony that can mix a mean jack and coke...

Sarah
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:04 PM

Mmmmmm.... cheeeezeburgerrrr... arllgrhhhhh......

Homer J. Simpson
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:05 PM

I love all three of these guys! So cute!

skippy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:05 PM

I've enjoyed the Patches video so many times and still laugh.

Patches died in 2006, almost 25, a long life for a burger-eating horse.

The same owners owned his mother and now have a son by Patches named Chip.

Kudos to them for spending time training Patches. How many horses stand in a pasture with nothing to do? Boring life for sure. Patches looked plenty happy to me!

Cute Lover
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:09 PM

While Patches is a lovely horse, I can't really say he's cute...this is more like weird.

A grazer that eats meat. Yikes...don't p*ss off Patches there grandpa or you could be next!!

Jacquie
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:10 PM

About the eating meat---I dunno, but if that is true, I'd take another look at the "hamburgers".

Larry Sheldon
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:17 PM

Seeing Patches nibble a burger reminded me of the parrot in the vet's office where I used to work. On Sundays, when the office was closed, I'd come in to take care of the animals, feed them and clean their cages. I'd leave the parrot's cage door open so it could roam.

One day, I had a chicken sandwich for lunch, and the parrot slid down his cage and walked across the floor to come beg me for a piece. It felt deeply perverse to feed a bit of chicken to a parrot. And that bird was ENJOYING it too.

Oooooeeeeoooo :twilightzonemusic:

Snowpea
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:25 PM

this is a repeat .... It is cute mind you but I have seen it before on here

kas
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:31 PM

Best video posted on C.O. EVAR!!!!!

Sarah K
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:32 PM

From the description, I thought Patches was going to be DRINKING the beer. Glad that didn't happen. Maybe he just eats the bun and condiments, not the meat?

I kept waiting for Patches to say "Willllburrrrrr!"

I have a feeling Patches would be able to drive that car if they'd let him.

snoopysnake
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:33 PM

these guys are so funny and sweet! it is clear they love patches and he loves them. it's a win- win situation. i've been laughing and struck down by redonkulous cuteness with this clip. unbelievable cute cute sweet sweet wonderful!!!

patches resting his chin on the windshield keeeled me.

some of you peeps comments are hilarious! this is great. (i've definitely skipped over the redneck stuff. leave the nastiness at the door please.)

jen
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:38 PM

You have truly blown my mind, cute overload. I have had my horizons expanded today.

That horse was PSYCHED to ride in that caddy....

Redonk, indeed.

Crinklefish
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:40 PM

Does that horse know he's a horse????????????

Lyds
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:43 PM

LOL, folks!! But I have to agree, let's stop the redneck/hillbilly stuff.

My thought was that people putting all that effort into making that horse happy are my kind of people!!

Gail
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:47 PM

Awesome to see folks so interested in their pet. Definitely a deep affection there :).

And quit with the redneck shtuff please. An accent does not define a person, thankyouverymuch. As for only ignorant rednecks doing something so dumb with their pets...is there no one who thinks doggie strollers (and clothes and ice cream and birthday parties) are a bit goofy?
/rant

Maggie
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 03:54 PM

I laughed when someone said there was something very American about this... I'm American but I can't remember the last time I put my non-existent pony in my non-existent Cadillac and went to the drive-thru! hehe

I enjoy the silliness but sad to hear Patches has passed on... he's frolicking in greener pastures, and they better have hamburgers!

lou
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 04:20 PM

its a late 70s mercury marquis. maybe a grand marquis. they never said anything about paper training. train him to shut the fridge. that would be something.

fluffy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 04:30 PM

NOOOO! Where's the video? It's goooone!

Fred Fnord
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 04:45 PM

As long as he's not a socialist, he's got my vote!!

LesbianNeoCon
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 04:46 PM

I actually think my favorite part is at the beginning where Robert in the back is holding Patches' rein.. as if Robert could hold onto Patches if he suddenly decided to jump from the car. Luckily for them all he apparently never tried that. And why would he.. where else would he have found cheezeburgers?! (speaking of which, he only seemed to be nibbling the bun and lettuce. The patty was still in Robert/Herbert's hand.)

Mary (the first)
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 04:57 PM

Poor dog was born a horse...

SarahMonster711
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 05:19 PM

tanks for the ponie!1! post i've been waitin for!

liz
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 05:28 PM

My dad's horse Stoney stole a salami sandwich from him during a trail ride and ate it... bread, mayo, salami, and all!

I loved this video, and the two gentlemen. They remind me of some of the characters I knew growing up in rural Arkansas. I always wanted to keep a horse in the house when I was little... I'm sure my parents are glad I didn't see this video then.

Mandy
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 06:53 PM

I'm pretty sure this is the best thing I've ever seen, and also, it kind of makes me love America.

hey-h
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 06:53 PM

And people wondered how mad cow disease started... Because idiots dont think about what's natural!

D Bledwich
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:00 PM

Only in the United States would we take a horse for a car ride. Geez we're lazy. However for Patches, I'd have taken him for a ride anywhere he wanted.

All I can think is if they ever got pulled over by a cop. For heaven's sake, IF A DOG OVER 40 POUNDS HAS TO WEAR A SEATBELT...

And remember, they're not Hillbillies, they're Sons of the Soil.

Kar
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:11 PM

I loved how he rested his chin on the windshield. A very relaxed car rider.

How can you keep a horse in the house...toileting wise? Can they be house trained? Did he go on the potty?

That would be the tricky part.

Otherwise, horses are just as clean as dogs or cats.

Mary
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:16 PM

Aside from the obvious problem of the horse being a herbivore, I don't see what's so disturbing about Patches eating a burger. It's not cannibalism. They're not even anywhere near being closely related genetically (artiodactyls versus perissodactyls). It's kind of along the same lines as a shark eating a fish of a different species or a bird of prey eating a passerine bird. Hell, or even a cat eating a mouse.

butter
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:27 PM

Er, "they" meaning "cows and horses."

butter
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:28 PM

OMG. OMG, this is so crazy! I don't really think that Patches slept in the bed though...I think that was just a trick they taught him. I mean he looked kind of uncomfortable with his feet hanging off the edge of the bed.

vanessa
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:31 PM

Okay, I guess the cows and horses are somewhat related (closer than cows to humans)since they're in the same superorder but are two different order, but not as close as all of the primes since the primates are all in one order.

butter
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:34 PM

Primes? Primates! Jeez, how many typos can one person create in five minutes?

butter
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:35 PM

Now that's a real american horse right there

redhades
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 07:55 PM

Hmmm is this footage from years ago, the cars in the parking lot look like they are from the 80s

Colleen
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 08:32 PM

Definitely a little surreal. :)

My favorite is the moments when the wind is whipping through his mane, and he's all like I ARE WILD STEEEEED! <3

Caitlin
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 08:35 PM

That was the first that I actually said something was redunkulous...or however you guys here spell it. :-) I'm a little disturbed by him eating the hamburgers...but I'm sure his feed has some sort of meat in it. I like how he seem sso happy when he's riding in the car.

Cauliflower
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 09:10 PM

Why is this so "American"? Has nobody ever read about Pippi Longstocking? Could be these two gents got their ideas about Horse N' Home from her!

SoCalSis
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:19 PM

Awwww, what a redonkulously happy little horsey! I thought he was huge until he stood on all fours! And did anyone notice that the car is painted like an appaloosa? :) I wanted to ruffle his mane and tickle his tubby belly!

And as for the "beef eating", I am not surprised - there was a case in India of a cow eating a chicken. It turned out that the cow was suffering from a vitamin deficiency and had resorted to killing the chicken! Animals can predict earthquakes and epileptic seizures - I guess they can find out whether they have a vitamin deficiency!

Also, Indian author Mahasweta Devi wrote in her memoirs "Our Non-Veg Cow and Other Stories" (translated from Bengali) about her pet cow who would eat fish. The explanation was simple - the cow ate a banana leaf (on which food is traditionally served in India) and it so happened that fish had been served on that leaf. So she developed a taste for fish!

Just because animals are classified according to OUR book doesn't mean they'll stick to that. THe Mad Cow scenario happened because farmers *deliberately* fed cows ground sheep brain. But if a herbivore naturally develops a taste for meat... it might be unusual and dangerous, but it's far better than having them eat plastic bags! (For which we humans are fully to blame.)

Anyway, in this clip, you can't really make out if he's eating the meat. It could be the bun only.

Subhangi
 |  Feb 13, 2008 at 10:30 PM

I love a bit of eccentricity.

Hon Glad
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 12:51 AM

@Subhangi: I'm thinking a non-vegetarian cow must have created quite a stir in India!! Cute story!!

Gail
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 01:52 AM

This was a cute video and a neat story about Patches.

Kind of ironic though that its two old guys who aren't married (are they?), yet they still need someone to get their beer for them and answer the phone. So they train a horse? LOL

Yeah, I'm kinda icked out that a horse was eating a McD's burger. Ewww!

Patches was a cutie though and treated very well obviously. RIP Patches.
Must have been all those burgers.

Jen
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 02:42 AM

@SoCalSis - Because...did you hear their accents??? And I love Pippi, but I gather she's not a real person - sigh.

hey-h
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 04:40 AM

Holy Wi-i-i-lbur!

And how totally shocking that there don't seem to be any womenfolk on the scene...

My sister's cat is a blob
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 05:11 AM


"The same owners owned his mother and now have a son by Patches named Chip."

ROTFLMAO Sorry I really don't like the redneck bashing but THAT was TOO FUNNY

I had a horse that would snitch hotdogs & donuts from the kids at horse shows.

LIttleredhen
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 08:02 AM

OMG. REDONK. Patches = badass.

Lil'Dutch
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 11:09 AM

Once I had a chicken sammich at horsebackriding lessons.

I put it on the pink-a-nick table for ONE MOMENT to shine a saddle for my horse, and it was gone.

And I saw mah pony smacking its lips. Indulgantly. Knowingly.

That was the day I quit horsebackriding.

J/k, j/k. XD But that did freak me out fierce.

Triptaphane
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 11:30 AM

god, that's just plain silly..

Terri
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 11:36 AM

I love this...notice that the windshield is padded for the horse to lean on in comfort?

tammytalking
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 11:36 AM

I'll totally disagree bout not treating animals as human. Gads I'll treat my dog and cat as my kids till the day I die or they pass on. They even allow us to sleep in thier bed. I would have a very restless night if I couldn't snuggel with my bangel kat and drift off to sleep every night.
Both my wife and I enjoy our kids tremendously and will always do so. Long live animals(kids).

TukaWuvy
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 02:44 PM

What a great video - those three sure know how to have fun in life, don't they?

Angry, shut the hell up.

Cerise
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 04:04 PM

ok Bubba.

horse belongs in the paddock.

you.......in the local watering hole.

A
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 05:52 PM

Remember, fast food burgers are mostly made of non-meat fillers NOT beef!

neighkaye
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 07:02 PM

Okay, maybe I've had too many cranberry & vodkas tonite, but this totally cracked me up....the southern accents, the Mr. Ed similarities....the weirdness, I loved the whole thing. Yay for Patches and his human redneck friends.

Miss Vicki
 |  Feb 14, 2008 at 09:00 PM

I'm happy to hear that the horse probably DRANK beer, not just fetched it. :-)

Silent Meow
 |  Feb 15, 2008 at 06:41 AM

neighkaye,
In that case, Patches shouldn't have an all-beef patty special sauce Big Mac (or so the old commercial went).

Silent Meow
 |  Feb 15, 2008 at 09:54 AM

Hey, I just wanted to mention that I have read before that wild Icelandic Horses have been known to eat fish. I assume these fish washed up on the beach, but it is kind of funny to picture horses waiting patiently in shallow water and stomping on fish. :-)

Jenni
 |  Feb 15, 2008 at 06:29 PM

Hee too cute! And good posts Subhangi and Butter... It is really no different than an animal eating any other animal... so unless you would want to forcefully enforce (lol) a veg.diet on every person, pet and other animals on the planet, there is nothing 'disturbing' about it. Unusual, yes. However what I find disturbing is when people quickly jump from 'that was unusual and unexpected to me' to 'I am disturbed'.. have an open mind people! :) That said, all adorable. :)

bcteagirl
 |  Feb 16, 2008 at 04:37 PM

obama? patches doesnt hate white people and would not not condone robbing crackers cause they owe them something.

sam
 |  Feb 17, 2008 at 07:24 AM

We used to have a pet duck that would eat chicken. :)

She'd climb into my uncle's lap while he was watching football, and nibble on his chicken leg. I'd come in to see my uncle saying, "Haw, yer eatin' yer cousin!"

Mipp
 |  Feb 25, 2008 at 11:10 AM

irony that the horse gets the front seat. BUT WHAT THE... horses dont eat cows, that's practically cannibalism and Patches is probably already dead from severe GI blockage and colorectal cancer. ALSO i wonder how many beatings it took for him to learn how to fetch beers and tuck himself into bed? but i do like that he joy rides.

vegetus
 |  Feb 26, 2008 at 05:15 AM

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