Hi. The name's Professor McGuinulator. I have a—er—request of sorts. [Snorts into hanky] You see, there is this online survey I'd like to, er, ask you to fill out. [More snorting and shuffling of papers]
It has, er, fascinating questions in it, like; 'what's your favorite animal?' And 'do you have a current passport?' Heh. You can even skip questions if you want to—the first page is the most important. I might grade you as a 'C' if you do that, though.
Vanessa C.; bee-boo-boo-bee-bee-boo-boo! [scientific console sounds]